Lost Territory Regained

Lake Mileage: 9k
MP3 Player: Madonna, The Immaculate Collection
Currently Reading: Satyr Square: A Year, A Life in Rome (Leonard Barkan)

I was pleased with the number on the scale this morning: 226 lbs. Not only is this figure comfortably past the 50-pound mark, but it's also the weight I'd achieved late last September, before I started to backslide through early January.

Obviously, I wish I'd spent the months between late September and now losing additional weight rather than re-gaining and re-losing some poundage, but at least now I'm back on track. In fact, I'm once again on track in the overall "100 pounds in 2 years" plan, as shown by the graph on the right-hand side of this page. I'd like to start putting up some numbers below the tracking line, but at least I'm no longer sitting above it.

And who knows? Maybe this recent delay allowed my body to get accustomed to weighing less than 280+ pounds, and that will help in the long run. Only time will tell about that. Right now, though, I'll happily settle for being on track again.

One Year, 43 Pounds Later (and Lighter!)

Unbelievably enough, it was a year ago today when I decided to add weight loss blogging to my list of ways to motivate myself. It's definitely been an up-and-down year in terms of success, but here's how I would sum it up the key points.

-I began with yet another effort at low-fat and restricted-calorie eating, which wasn't nearly as effective as it had been in the past, and then in May 2009 I tried the low-carb Atkins approach, which was definitely more effective and did take some weight off. I really appreciate an eating plan where I'm not feeling food-deprived all the time, which I'm sure was part of the reason that the restricted-calorie diets didn't work in the long term for me - that, and the fact that carbs messed up my blood sugar and made me even hungrier.

-I had periods of solid weight loss, but I also hit some plateaus and had one dangerous backslide in the fall, when I regained 15-20 pounds after reaching a good low at the end of the summer. Unlike a few other times in my life, though, I didn't stop weighing myself and gradually give up when I saw things heading in reverse. (A definite benefit of blogging: if I hadn't committed myself to posting my weight here every 10 days, the scale might be gathering dust by now while I played the Denial Game!)

-I made a lot of progress in terms of exercise. Last year I was satisfied with 25 minutes on the elliptical machine; now I do at least an hour every time I climb onto it.

So here I am, one year later, with a lower resting pulse and a net weight loss of 43 pounds. How do I feel about that? Honestly, I was aiming for at least 50: my goal was - and to some extent still is - to take off 100 pounds in 2 years, so I fell a little short this past year. On the other hand, I got most of those 50, and 43 pounds is still a substantial amount of weight; the calculator tells me that's over 15% of the 280.5 pounds I started with.

So overall, it was a good year. I guess I should celebrate by starting Year Two off with an hour or so on the elliptical!

Speaking Too Soon

I'm starting to suspect that blogging about weight loss awakens mysterious unseen forces which keep us from getting too confident: that is, no sooner do I write a confident post than whatever positive trends I'd noticed will change. It's enough to make a person superstitious, in a "don't tempt fate" or "don't get the gods angry" kind of way.

Clearly, my most recent post was overconfident to some degree. I expected to have dropped at least a couple more pounds in the 10 days between that post and this one, especially since I've remained steady in my commitment to working out and I've actually increased the length of my sessions on the elliptical; I never do anything less than an hour now. Annoyingly enough, though, the scale this morning didn't say what I wanted it to. I'm not ecstatic about the single, solitary pound it says I've shed: at my size, 1 pound can be a totally normal daily variation based on water retention, how much food is in my system, etc. But it does at least mean that I haven't gained any net weight over the last 10 days, which is reassuring to someone like me who can easily acquire poundage with no effort. Also, it goes to show how unpredictable the whole process with all its countless variables can be.

So what to do now? Get changed and climb back on the elliptical! Whatever the scale says, today's workout will bring me to a total of 24 days during January. That's a good number for me - it means I spent an entire day this month working out!

Gaining Traction

Over Christmas, we had a blizzard here. Driving in the snow and ice for the next few days took me back to growing up near Syracuse, where bad roads and blocked driveways were a fact of life from December through April. My car even got stuck once, which meant I had to to-and-fro a lot, alternating forward and reverse while trying the steering wheel at different angles, until my faithful Toyota found enough traction to get me off the patch of ice and snow and out of the ruts my tires had spun themselves into.

Obviously, there's a diet metaphor here. For the last few months of 2009, my weight-loss tires couldn't find much traction at all, and I wasn't going in the direction I wanted; I was even sliding backwards into higher numbers on the scale. In the last ten days, though, I've been more rigorous about cutting carbs and doing hard workouts, and today the scale showed definite progress: I got myself off the icy patch of the 240's, where I've been spinning my wheels, and at least for the time being, I feel back in control. Let's hope it lasts ...

Diet and Exercise, Exercise and Diet

If there's one thing on which there's pretty much a consensus in the world of weight loss, it's that effective and sustained slimming-down requires both diet and exercise. This isn't exactly news, despite the fact that every couple weeks another magazine or newspaper or website treats it as if no one had ever suggested the idea before:

For Fitness, Cutting Calories May Not Be Enough - US News and World Report

In addition, the authors of autobiographical weight-loss books and blogs can't sing this same chorus enough, constantly proclaiming the joyful synergy of the two sides of the process - how their athletic endeavors make them eat better and how their healthful eating fuels their workouts.

But me? I have to admit that I have a really hard time doing both at the same time. Right now, for instance, I'm exercising regularly, and that is a rare change from my usual winter lethargy. I'm doing an hour on the elliptical 5-6 days/week, and even going out running occasionally when the sun comes out.

But does this uncharacteristic motivation spill over into my eating? Am I able to euphorically control my appetite and thus maximize my weight loss? Nope. Of course, this is partly because the exercise makes me hungry. Very hungry. Worse still, it makes me hungry for sugar, which is a very bad thing.

Similarly, there are periods of time when I have no trouble following my diet plans, resisting the temptation to snack, ignoring the siren songs of the vending machine at work, the bakery counter at Panera, and the ease of obtaining drive-through McDonald's french fries on my way home from work. During those times, I have my appetite under control - but am I usually exercising regularly, too? Nope, almost never. Why? Because I don't have the extra energy!

Even beyond this interplay of appetite versus energy, I often feel like I only have a certain amount of will power in reserve - and it's enough will power to control my eating or my exercise, but not both at the same time. I can will myself to exercise, but if I do that several times a week, there's not enough left in the tank to also will myself not to eat candy at the movies. And I can will myself to count carbs and stop eating when I reach my daily allotted maximum, but most of the time I can't also force myself into my shorts and Nikes.

I do know one solution to the problem: being a different person, an athletic, fit guy with a cooperative metabolism who naturally lives the right way. But I'm me. I like rich foods, and I don't like exercise. Given my druthers, I'd just as soon eat lots of unhealthful foods and sell the elliptical on Ebay - but then I'd get fat to the point of having to buy two seats on the plane, and that's also not acceptable.

There are never any easy answers, are there?!

The Envelope, Please?

Well, it's January 1, 2010, the first New Year's Day of a new decade (at least as popularly measured), and this morning I hopped on the scale to see where I stand. The envelope, please? I'm starting the Tens (or whatever we'll end up calling it) at 241 lbs.

This number is not spectacular, I'll be the first to admit, and I'd actually hoped to kick off the year in the 230's rather than the 240's, just because it would feel like more of an accomplishment. There's also been a bit of backsliding beginning with my birthday in late October and extending through Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year's - I'd gotten down into the mid-220's but hit a plateau and then lost some ground.

But on the other hand, 241 still shows real progress. A year ago, on January 1, 2009, I weighed in at 276, so I'm exactly 35 pounds lighter today. A month after that, on the day I started my latest diet campaign as well as this blog, I weighed 280.5, so I'm nearly 40 lbs. thinner than that now. And my heaviest weight in 2009 was 284, so I've lost 43 pounds from that worst point last year: 15% of that peak weight. All of these numbers are good.

Also, a look at my exercise logs - okay, that's a fancy way of saying my kitchen calendar, which is where I scribble down how far I run or how long I do the elliptical machine - tells me that I've doubled my workout duration in the past year. Last January I was doing around 25 minutes on the elliptical, but now I'm doing 50-60 minutes every time I use it. That suggests I'm significantly more fit in the cardiovascular area than I was a year ago, and that's probably even more important in terms of my overall health, given that I'm at the age when guys start having their first heart attacks. Not only that, this fall I ran two charity 5k races - I wasn't fast, but I finished them both and wasn't either the oldest or the slowest guy running. They provided me with good motivation (and t-shirts!), so I'd like to do a few more of those this year.

So where do I go from here? What are my plans for 2010? Obviously, I need to start moving the number on the scale downward again, so I want to go back to the Atkins Induction Phase for a jump-start. I have to cut the carbs way back again to try for measurable results. I want to keep upping my workout length and/or intensity, and this may require a visit to a sports medicine specialist, to find out why I still sometimes get leg pains and cramps when I run. And by this time next year, I'd like to be able to fit into some clothes hanging in my closet that I'm close, but not close enough, to wearing again!

Happy 2010 to all!

In Praise of Alec Baldwin's Belly: Talkin' 'Bout My Inspiration!

(Alec Baldwin in It's Complicated)

Now, I'm not usually prone to giving movie stars blog space - they already have publicists to make sure their pics are everywhere. I also don't like to overpraise Nancy Meyer's fun but formulaic romantic comedies aimed at "women of a certain age", especially given their complete absence of any characters who aren't white and wealthy.

However, I've got to give a shout-out here to Meyer's newest offering, It's Complicated, for one simple reason: its presentation of the far-from-svelte and no-longer-youthful Alec Baldwin as a 50-something, overweight guy who nevertheless still has that make-her-knees-buckle alpha-male vibe and is still hot as hell, hairy paunch be damned.

I'm old enough to remember Baldwin in his Streetcar Named Desire days, when he could make an audience catch its breath by tearing off his shirt (which he did regularly on Broadway!). Unlike a lot of aspiring heartthrobs then and now, Baldwin didn't shave or wax his chest and abs, but you know what? He was amazingly hot, partly thanks to his muscles but even more thanks to his take-no-prisoners, sex-on-a-stick attitude.

Well, here we are a couple decades later, and Baldwin has definitely put on some extra poundage, as the pics above show and as anyone can see by flipping on their television Thursday nights for 30 Rock. He's somewhere between beefy and stout now, but the old swagger is still there and in this movie he is totally credible confusing the hell out of ex-wife Meryl Streep with his renewed ardor for her.

Better still, Baldwin is comfortable enough with his weight to use it to texture his characterization. Standing in his undershorts after sex with Streep, he can slap his hairy paunch and comment on all the weight he's gained in his second marriage - but with no trace of embarrassment. He can banter about his weight with Streep, asking her, "Why do you keep calling me 'Big Guy'? Is it because I'm fat?" And he can sprawl naked on Streep's bed, then explain afterwards that he thought she'd find that tactic "irresistible" - even though he's doughy and not buff these days.

Any guy with issues about his weight should see this film, just to watch Baldwin be sexy despite being substantially overweight by most standards and downright fat compared to the media's presentation of buff (not to mention hairless) guys with toned abs as the masculine ideal. Baldwin's Jake looks his age and carries the extra pounds that many middle-aged guys (yours truly included) can't manage to shed, either. But he's not a hapless sidekick or a pathetic, deluded loser: he's the movie's leading man, he's bracingly virile, and he exudes self-confidence, either in spite of - or because of - that paunchy body.

Am I saying we should all give up on losing weight? Hell no, it's still a healthful thing to do. But should overweight guys hide indoors until we lose enough weight to consider ourselves publicly "presentable"? Hell no, again. We need to learn to unbutton our shirts and slap those bellies of ours as long as we're still carrying them around.